How to Cope With The End of Your Sports Career
By: Misty Buck, Athlete Mental Health Coach, and Contributor to HOFH
As an athlete, you have likely overwhelmingly dedicated your life to your sport, so when the end of your sports career comes, it can be an incredibly difficult transition. It’s common for athletes to face a period of grieving but to also wrestle with struggles in such monumental losses as identity and purpose. This process is very normal, but it can also lead many to struggle with mental health issues like anxiety or depression.
It can feel like a monumental challenge to go from being in the top 1% of something to now trying to figure out what else you can be great at. In a period of significant transition, it’s important to take the time to process your emotions, grieve in a healthy way, and create new goals for yourself. With the right strategies, you can make the end of your sports career an opportunity to grow and develop. The end of your sports career doesn’t have to mean the end of your purposeful journey – it can be the start of a new one.
Grieving and processing the end of a sports career in a healthy way
The very first step in successfully transitioning into life after sports is the grieving process. Allow yourself to feel all of the varying emotions so that you can begin to find peace and closure. There is no specific timeframe for this process as it is totally personal to you. However, there are some steps you can take to help yourself cope.
“Athletes moving into retirement either through choice, injury, or other circumstances need to process the identity transition they will experience. It is imperative to spend time with a trusted friend, coach, counselor, or family members and acknowledge the end of a chapter. By honoring the years spent investing in their athletic career, an athlete can celebrate all that has been accomplished, while also looking forward to all that will be in the future. One structure for this process is to actively name or write out the meaningful things about their career and what they will miss. Grieving and saying goodbye is an appropriate rite of passage at this point. Then the athlete can turn their focus to what they are looking forward to in the future,” says Kristen M. Turner, a provider with Hall of Fame Health.
She suggests five questions to help guide this process:
What do you love about your sport? Is it just this sport or other sports, too?
What are you NOT going to miss about your sport?
What is a favorite memory in your career?
What aspects of retirement are you looking forward to in the near future?
What activities have you put off until you retire that you hope to do now?
Leverage the skills you learned in your sport
Once your athletic career ends, you might discover that you’re able to apply many of the skills you acquired during your playing days in new personal and professional ways. Start by making a list of every positive skill you learned from being an athlete. It’s easy to focus on what you’ve lost so spend some time focusing on what you gained. You can then use that to help propel you forward into your next chapter.
“Throughout the course of an athlete’s career, many have internalized transferable skills that will serve them well in the termination of their sport career and life after sport. Cultivated through years of persistent hard work, cooperation, discipline, time management, and work ethic, they have unknowingly built a strong foundation for future growth,” adds Turner. “Such skills as working as a part of a team, mental toughness, collaboration, ambition, and coachability will equip them as they do the hard work of identity transformation to a new adventure post sport career.”
Reach out for support and remain coachable
Approach this new chapter of your life with a sense of curiosity. Envisioning a different life for yourself can feel overwhelming, and that’s completely normal. You can reduce suffering by being open and curious rather than attaching yourself too much to the feelings of loss and confusion.
Reach out to alumni groups and others who understand what you’re going through. Your organization might offer an alumni program, or you might choose to connect with other former athletes through such mediums as peer groups.
To be coachable, however, you can’t stay isolated. Connect with people who can help you and lean into the idea that you can and will find a new purpose and meaning in your life. Embrace that you’re right where you are for a reason and that your story is just getting started.
Redefining yourself outside of athletics
As an athlete, you may have knowingly or unknowingly labeled your entire identity as being an athlete. What’s important to realize as you try to move on is that being an athlete is only part of who you are. It may have felt like it’s all that you were because of the endless hours, grueling schedules, and commitment, but that’s only because you lived within the container of sports for so long. The truth is that you are a whole person which extends to much, much more than your athletic abilities alone. Now that your playing days are over, you have the opportunity to rediscover your whole self, and that’s a process that takes time, grace, and self-compassion.
While it can be tempting to focus solely on past successes, it can be helpful to identify new goals and interests, both in terms of your career and in terms of your personal life. This can help to refocus your mind, build confidence, and cope with the end of your athletic career. In developing your identity after sports, keep in mind that although it can feel like you’re starting a whole new life, you’re still you. Even when things are tough, remember that everyone deals with struggles and obstacles in life no matter who they are. Even on the days it doesn’t feel like it, you are resilient and you have a purpose so keep going.
Are you struggling with the transition into life after sports? Call the HOFH concierge call line at (866) 404-HOFH to learn more about how our team may be able to help. The service line is open to athletes and non-athletes, and all calls are confidential. Scholarship funds may be available on a case-by-case basis through Fund Recovery. If you are experiencing a mental health emergency or require emergency assistance, please call the HOFH Crisis Line at 866-901-1245, call 911, or head to your nearest local emergency room.
About the Author: Misty Buck is an athlete mental health and mindset coach and contributor to Hall of Fame Health. She can be reached at https://purposesoulathletics.com.